Dubai: The Real Man’s Playground

Above: The Burj Al Arab hotel in Dubai, UAE. Burj Al Arab is a luxury 5 star hotel built on an artificial island in front of Jumeirah beach
Above: The Burj Al Arab hotel in Dubai, UAE. Burj Al Arab is a luxury 5 star hotel built on an artificial island in front of Jumeirah beach

It doesn’t take a millionaire to feel a million dollars when in the Middle East’s equivalent of Capitalist Heaven. Rent a luxury sports car for next to nothing and cruise around the streets with the music blaring and the warm desert winds blowing through your hair; hire a local guide to take you sand duning in a state of the art 4X4 jeep and feel the adrenaline rushing through your body as you jump and drop tens of feet in the hot red sands; and even meterosexuals will feel right at home being pampered from head to toe in one of the many 5-star luxury resorts… Well why should women have all the beauty treatment?

Dubai is world famous for its’ bustling Gold Souk, the home of top quality carat gold at bargain basement prices… if you are willing to haggle for them. Let the atmosphere whisk you away as you meander your way through the glistening gold chains, diamond laden designer watches and chunky silver rings. Even the rich and famous of Dubai’s luxurious high-rise apartments can be found haggling their way to getting a bargain or two, so you won’t be in bad company. When haggling it is important to remain calm and smile, but when you find that amazingly shiny gold chain and you haggle the seller down to tens of Dirhams you can casually walk down the road with the sun reflecting, catching glimpses of the beautiful locals who stare in awe at your new purchase. It takes a real man to haggle with the feisty local traders, so are you man enough?

A real man likes a glass of champagne or four. Every Friday, although the holiest day in the Muslim calendar, is known as “champagne day” when literally everyone in the bustling metropolis rushes to one of the 450 licensed hotels or bars to partake in a champagne brunch. Don’t expect any limits to the amount of champagne on offer and don’t expect cheap watery champagnes either. In the famous Le Meridien and Fairmont hotels you will be offered a piled high buffet table filled with the likes of oysters and prime grilled steaks, Laurent Perrier and Moët champagnes and even a few locals singing and dancing on the tables… Shhhh don’t tell the wife, bring her to Dubai for a luxurious champagne buffet (which costs next to nothing) and treat your lady like a million dollars and make her think that you’re doing well in life… We won’t tell her don’t worry.

The real man’s biggest toy in Dubai is the helicopter, and you can hire one with a fully qualified pilot for a few hundred Dirham. Take a short flight past the world’s tallest building, the Burj Khalifa; fly over the world’s tallest hotel the Burj al Arab; hover across the many man-made islands including the legendary ‘Palm Jumeirah’ and ‘the globe’; so sit back and relax with a glass of bubbly in one hand and your new dazzling diamond watch on the other.

Dubai, the real man’s playground with so much to offer to you (and any guest you begrudgingly decide to take along) is just waiting to be discovered. However you decide to explore, like a millionaire with an endless bank balance; like a first world trader hunting for amazing treasures to take back home; or as a simple tourist. Dubai is the world’s top real man’s playground.

Joe Worthington

Joe Worthington is a multi-published travel writer and a successful political journalist, editor & analyst with hundreds of commissions in his portfolio. Joe has worked with clients across the whole spectrum ranging from inflight magazines to the European Parliament and UNESCO. He is always on the lookout for new work opportunities and loves to travel whenever he has the opportunity to do so. You can find more of his work via his Twitter handle: @travelwith_joe.

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